While I was working, I thought that it was a much easier job to be at a full-time job than it was to be a stay-at-home parent. A worker gets a break from work at home, and a break from home at work (a work-at-home parent gets neither). Ofcourse the worker also carries the stress from home to work and vice versa.
Now that I'm temporarily an SAHM, I'm amazed that I used to do most of what I do now, and go to the office. I guess the grass always appears greener on my side of the fence to me. But I can still see why SAHMhood is harder - I'm guessing that we get a lot less appreciation for what we do at home.
Most people realize that you are working hard if you are doing something "important" (meaning it pays real money). Well, taking care of a home and a child is hard work. There is no evidence of the results of the work at the end of the day - the meals are eaten and gone, the cleaned dirty dishes are dirty again, the cleaned up living room is sprinkled with crayons and crumbs and scraps of paper again. All the moments that had been spent making a child happy - the visits to park, the coloring done together, the dressing of the dolls - are gone (hopefully deposited into a happy memories piggy bank somewhere), and all that is left is a cranky sleepy child.
There are no reviews on paper to tell you what a good job you've done. Everybody needs appreciation and acknowledgement of what they do, even if they already know that they are working hard. If you are a stay-at-home mom or dad and are reading this, here is my review. You are doing great at an amazing, demanding, challenging job, and the adorable evidence to this is growing in front of your eyes.
8 comments:
Thank you for that review Aps!
And thanks for inspiring me by being the eternal optimist.
I do hope we can encash in some form from that happy memories piggy bank! Oh wait - I just did!
The good days have returned for me!
Love
d
ps - lotsa love to summy and please do keep us updated with pictures.
hey i was thinking about it aps, and you know what - though i love cribbing about my situation (whatever situation i am in) - at some level i do realise and feel like the grass is greener on my side of the fence - i truly don't envy and do not want to trade with working mothers - i admire many of them for being organised enough to fit two roles into their day and doing both well, but i also do realise that if i had to choose for myself (i had to and i did) i'd choose to do what i am now doing! hard as it may be it is easier! and unrewarding as it may seem, it is more rewarding!
thank you for making me think about it!
love
d
:D taking a bow!
Thanks Aps. I needed that right about now. And I agree with D...I feel and know that the grass is just peachy and lush on my side of the fence. No way would I trade, even for a moment.
:) It's not just the way you write, it's the way you see everything in life - and perhaps life itself. There's so much to learn from you, aps...I know Summy will pass this on to her kids and thank you silently for making her who she is.
And my regards to your parents - I know they had a big hand what you turned out to be :)
-g
Hi Aparna...i am new to your blog.
I know exactly what you are talking about. I am a work-at-home mom and its tough alright.
I had writte about this a while back.http://orangeicecandy.blogspot.com/2007/08/10-reasons-why-this-is-tougher-job-than.html
nice to meet you!
lovely post!
Perfectly right aparna. I just stepped thru your blog. You are apt in sayonng that. Saturday and Sundays, my day starts early morning and never seems to end with bathing the 2, feeding, brushing, dressing, diapering etc. I am happy to go to work the other 5 days of week and relax. I feel a pinch staying away from kids, but i definitely know how tough it gets for SAHM.
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